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Suppose we can understand the reasons why our tweens and teens have the desire to get high, drunk, or anything else. If we can do that, we can begin to pull back the veil and peer into their mindset and what is causing them to be rebellious. It's necessary to recognize, though, that every teen is different and unique in their own right, and there are no two identical situations as to why each tween or teen does drugs. This makes it vital to understand why they choose to use drugs & alcohol. Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Start Here! Blogs More More Find us on Social! >>> You are Here: CurlyStache | Tweens & Teens Using Drugs & Alcohol: WHY is Vital Privacy Policy | Cookies Policy | Contact Us Tweens & Teens Using Drugs & Alcohol: WHY is Vital Guiding teenagers who gravitate to their drug or alcohol of choice In this blog: In this blog: Raising teens today and maneuvering through drug & alcohol abuse Top 13 reasons WHY tweens & teens use or abuse long after experimentation Suppose we can understand the reasons why our tweens and teens have the desire to get high, drunk, or anything else. If we can do that, we can begin to pull back the veil and peer into their mindset and what is causing them to be rebellious in doing what we've most likely preached against for their entire life. When and if we can accomplish this, we can nip the problem in the bud and potentially additional related issues. It's necessary to recognize, though, that every teen is different and unique in their own right, so there are no two identical situations as to why each tween or teen does drugs. This means you must really focus and pay attention to the littlest details to understand the why. Written By Daniel Currie Published: November 27, 2023 Relativity Rating What's this? Drugs are bad*. I am pretty sure if you are a parent, grandparent, guardian, or simply a sensible, caring human being with a tween or teenager in your life, you know this. There are thousands of blogs and websites out there that will tell you this, with hundreds of ways to prevent drug abuse and misuse while encouraging healthy decision-making. Although the CurlyStache stance is that we strongly agree with those statements, this article will not dwell on it. Instead, let's try to understand why tweens and teens make those decisions. How come they choose to continue down the rabbit hole even when (and especially when) they know it is wrong, unhealthy, and usually carries the potential of life-threatening risks. Remember, this article talks less about trying something for the first time . I have tailored this entry toward those who use drugs recreationally or worse. Nevertheless, understanding why tweens and teens begin down this road is half the battle and, critically, often gets overlooked. Suppose we can intimately understand their attraction to the drug or drugs and its appeal. In that case, we can empathize and understand their position, allowing us to custom-fit a regimen to help them. Additionally, it will enable us to see through to them on a deeper level, encouraging them to engage and reach out. Furthermore, by doing this, they become more comfortable confiding in you when asking for help and guidance in these tricky times. It is imperative to remember there are hundreds of reasons, even multiple reasons, why our teens do what they do, using or abusing drugs. Furthermore, each reasoning is usually just as complex as the tween or teen. Regardless, I have included the top 13 reasons why our tweens and teens continue to use or abuse drugs long after the experimentation phase: It is imperative to remember there are hundreds of reasons, even multiple reasons, why our teens do what they do, using or abusing drugs. Furthermore, each reasoning is usually just as complex as the tween or teen. Regardless, I have included the top 13 reasons why our tweens and teens continue to use or abuse drugs long after the experimentation phase: It is imperative to remember there are hundreds of reasons, even multiple reasons, why our teens do what they do, using or abusing drugs. Furthermore, each reasoning is usually just as complex as the tween or teen. Regardless, I have included the top 13 reasons why our tweens and teens continue to use or abuse drugs long after the experimentation phase: It is imperative to remember there are hundreds of reasons, even multiple reasons, why our teens do what they do, using or abusing drugs. Furthermore, each reasoning is usually just as complex as the tween or teen. Regardless, I have included the top 13 reasons why our tweens and teens continue to use or abuse drugs long after the experimentation phase: ◄ Previous Next ► Remember, most of the time, there are multiple reasons. For example, little Peter, 13 years old, has been caught stealing his parent's beer and drinking it in the past. Since then, Mom and Dad started counting the cans and watching them closely to ensure Peter doesn't continue. A year later, Mom and Dad catch him again, realizing he is still stealing their beer, but only waiting until they are drunk and not paying close attention to the count anymore. He is clearly consuming by choice now, with the only reason he couldn't use is "out of curiosity." This is when it becomes necessary to start understanding his mindset, "this" being the second time getting caught, presuming the first time was for experimental or curiosity reasons. Nevertheless, since he was caught red-handed for the second time, his Mom and Dad must take a unique stance with distinctive action when talking with him. They must discipline Peter for breaking the rules and doing something illegal. Mom and Dad's attitude and demeanor become paramount at this point. How they come off will directly impact his reaction, how he responds, and potentially their relationship after the fact. Despite their disappointment and anger in Peter, Mom and Dad should remain as calm, relaxed, and collected as possible—even if they need to take a break and talk later. They mustn't fly off the handle, much like an authoritarian would. Conversely, completely blowing it off, becoming permissive or neglectful , is irresponsible and not good parenting either. Instead, Mom and Dad must be firm yet compassionate, remembering he is doing what makes him feel good too (parents are the same way—they just have the wisdom and "big-picture" understanding!). They must respect, listen without interruption, and be patient with their teen. The goal is to become more authoritative while being sensitive toward Peter's feelings and ensuring openness and presence for the teen. During their talk about drinking, they gave Peter the floor, allowing him to explain his actions with his own reasonings, without interruption or interjection. Although his parents disagreed with his explanation, and there was no excuse, it improved the chances of Peter returning the same respect after they attentively listened, allowing Peter to explain himself. Once Peter laid it all out for them and was given ample opportunity to say what he needed without anyone intervening, it was Mom and Dad's turn. Knowing they were getting the best version of Peter in a bad situation now, they began asking questions in hopes of understanding why he was still drinking. In this thought experiment, some of the questions (and answers) during their sit-down were: Why? But why alcohol and not something else? I'm thankful it wasn't drugs, though; I'm just curious. At y our age, drinking is just as bad as drugs. Where did you see that drinking was cool? How long has this been going on for? Do you honestly plan on stopping? Do you feel this 'urge' to NEED to drink even if you want to do something else? —"It makes me feel weird. But good." —"Drugs scare me, and both of you drink, so I thought it can't be as bad as weed or something like that." —"Well, none of my friends drink, I don't think, but stuff like that shows up on Insta and Twitter sometimes, sometimes Snapchat stories. But I promise, really, I don't have that stuff set as my interests/favorites or following or anything like that. It just shows up occasionally." —"I dunno. Let's just say it isn't the first time... Sorry." —"Yes and no. I would like to because it kind of seems stupid since I've drunk a few times, but I like the feeling, too." —"No, I only stole a few beers when you stopped paying attention. Otherwise, I wouldn't have cared and just figured out a way to get them if I felt like I NEEDED it- like I do ice cream!" After asking the proper questions and trying to figure out why Peter was doing it, they found it was most likely 3-parts "boredom and instant gratification," 2-parts "social media," and 1-part "family history," with the father's side having a history of abuse. With this information, Mom and Dad, after talking about it and not rushing to judgment, found the best form of punishment was giving him 1 hour of Internet per day. The thought process was that they would allow Peter one chance to clean up his actions on his own before seeking professional help, with family history being put into question. Limited Internet would force him to budget his time for online homework and other "essential" online needs, leaving little time for social media since that was a key factor. While that example was pretty detailed and in-depth, knowing there is more to it is important, too. For instance, your tween or teen's body language plays a role, knowing when a lie is being told and knowing that perhaps only half the truth is being told. In addition, it is essential to keep a vigilant eye out afterward for changes—good or bad. A misnomer that you will often hear when it comes to drug or alcohol abuse is "watch for attitude or behavior issues." Why is that a misnomer? Isn't it true? Sure, 95% of the time, your tween or teen's attitude or behavior will have issues and worsen. However, in the case of an undiagnosed health condition, it could become the opposite, where the adverse or negative happens. For example, if your tween or teen started showing symptoms of what would become OCD if left untreated and then began smoking marijuana around the same time. While under the influence, their behavior or mindset may improve via, in essence, self-medicating. In contrast, if they abruptly stop, the symptoms of OCD would become far more prevalent, causing them to appear to be under the influence or dependent on a drug. An involved, caring parent who wants nothing but the best for their tween or teen must constantly, without rest, keep a sharp eye out on their teen's surroundings. Half the battle in most cases when raising teens today is understanding the why, not just how to deal with it. Your tween or teen will continue to grow, making their own decisions. Our primary job as parents, grandparents, guardians, or whatever the relationship is is to ensure we do the best we can for them and guide them down the straight and narrow so that they become successful in life one day. More CurlyStache Blog Posts! Memento Mori: Happy Halloween CurlyStache Mashups CurlyStache Mashups Written By: Daniel Currie Published on: Saturday, October 28, 2023 Read Now 👉 Episode: Daniel Currie Up Previous Next Up Memento Mori: Happy Halloween CurlyStache Full-Length Blogs CurlyStache Full-Length Blogs Written By: Daniel Currie Published on: Saturday, October 28, 2023 Read Now 👉 Up Previous Next Up * While this article is designed with illegal drugs (for all ages) and alcohol for those under the legal age in mind, many aspects of this blog can pertain to issues regarding 18+ or 21+ age "drugs," such as smoking or vaping and prescription/OTC drugs. Notes Comments Let us know what you think, the floor is yours! ▲ Back to Top Start Here! 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Guiding teenagers with essential parenting dos and don'ts. CurlyStache is a endeavor where we are not aiming to make profits, only to help those who need help. About Us At Guiding Teenagers, or GT for short, we empower parents and guardians with robust support and insightful guidance to confidently navigate the complexities of raising teens in today's unpredictable world. Our commitment to being an ever-present ally ensures adults have the necessary resources to foster the growth and maturity of young adults amidst life's challenging situations. Suggest Topics We cordially invite your ideas and topics for future blog posts – your input is crucial in shaping content that resonates with you. Share your suggestions with us; we're dedicated to creating articles that are tailored for your needs and interests! Our Vision At Guiding Teenagers, our vision is to create a beacon of knowledge, information, and advice that consistently exceeds your expectations. We aspire for Guiding Teenagers to be your go-to destination, a place where every visit to www.guidingteenagers.com enriches you with more than you sought. In our commitment to this vision, we're excited to expand our offerings, introducing innovative ways to connect and share. Imagine tuning into our upcoming podcast, where we delve into recent blogs and current events, exploring their impact on parents and teens. This is just the beginning – we're also exploring additional services, adapting to your needs and the evolving digital landscape. Our ambition is boundless, our potential unlimited – at Guiding Teenagers, we're not just reaching for the stars; we're aiming to surpass them, creating an ever-evolving platform that grows with you and for you. Guiding Teenagers Raising strong teens with heart, guiding bright futures with wisdom.

Recognize the subtle signs of manipulation by your child. Empower yourself with knowledge and actionable strategies to address, promote, and foster a healthy home. Six Key Signs Your Child Is Manipulating You and What You Can Do GT Mashup Blog: Episode 014 Written By : Daniel Currie Published On : 3 /14 /2024 When navigating the complex world of child and teen behavior, our children's behaviors can be as complicated as they are enchanting. At the heart of parental concerns is discerning the line between benign persuasion and outright manipulation. This journey requires a keen eye, as the subtleties of manipulation can sometimes cloak themselves in the guise of innocence, making it essential to recognize the signs your child is manipulating you. Relativity Rating: Everybody Under 20 What's this? The Fine Line Between Persuasion and Manipulation in Children Persuasion is a skill, honed over giggles and tears, where children learn the art of negotiation. Manipulation, however, is persuasion's shadowy counterpart; it's when these negotiations turn into emotional heists, especially in manipulating teens, leaving parents feeling outwitted. Why It's Important to Recognize Manipulative Behaviors Early Early recognition of manipulative tendencies is pivotal. It's not merely about curbing undesired behaviors but about understanding the emotional undercurrents driving these actions. Addressing these behaviors early can pave the way for healthier communication patterns, especially when guilt trips or attention-seeking are involved. Unveiling the Signs of Manipulation Six Signs your child is manipulating you here! Excessive Flattery : When Compliments Have an Ulterior Motive Compliments from children can warm the heart unless they're a prelude to a request. This strategic flattery is often the child's first foray into manipulation, testing the waters to see how effective sweetness can be as leverage for their attention-seeking. Guilt Trips : Leveraging Emotional Connections Guilt trips exploit the deep emotional bond between parent and child, transforming love into a currency. It's manipulation masquerading as affection, a clever tactic to sway parental decisions, revealing clear signs your child is manipulating you. Avoiding Responsibility : The Mastery of Shifting Blame When mistakes become someone else's fault in a child's narrative, we're witnessing a diversion expert at work. This evasion of accountability is a cornerstone of manipulative behavior, sidestepping growth opportunities. Emotional Blackmail : "If You Really Loved Me..." This phrase is emotional manipulation distilled to its essence. It weaponizes love, suggesting that affection is conditional on compliance. It's a red flag, signaling a need to reassess communication dynamics. The Silent Treatment : Using Silence as a Power Play Silence, when wielded with precision, becomes a formidable tool in a child's manipulation arsenal. This tactic often leaves parents in a dilemma, unsure how to bridge the communication chasm it creates. Sudden Behavioral Shifts : Recognizing the Red Flags Abrupt changes in behavior or attitude can be harbingers of underlying manipulation. These shifts are alarm bells, signaling that it's time to delve deeper into your child's emotional state. Understanding the Why Behind the Behavior The Quest for Attention and Its Many Forms At its core, manipulative behavior often stems from a craving for attention. Children, in their quest to be seen and heard, may resort to manipulation as a means to ensure their emotional needs are met. Exploring Boundaries: A Natural Phase or a Concerning Pattern? Testing limits is a natural part of child development. However, when boundary exploration mutates into manipulative behavior, it's essential to intervene, guiding children towards more constructive ways of expressing their needs. Learned Behaviors: The Mirror Effect of the Home Environment Children are masterful at mimicking, absorbing, and replicating behaviors they observe. In many cases, manipulative actions are learned within the home, a reflection of the relational dynamics they witness. Addressing Manipulative Behaviors: Strategies That Work What you can do with proven strategies! Communication is Key : Initiating Open and Honest Conversations Open dialogue is the antidote to manipulation. It creates a safe space for children to express their needs without resorting to emotional gymnastics. Consistency and Boundaries : The Pillars of Response Consistency in response and clear boundaries dissuade manipulative tactics by establishing predictable consequences for actions. It's the scaffolding upon which healthy relational dynamics are built. Positive Reinforcement : Encouraging Desired Behaviors Highlighting and rewarding honest communication reinforces the value of transparency over manipulation. It's about nurturing the soil from which genuine interactions can grow. Leading by Example : The Role of Parental Behavior in Shaping Children Parents are the architects of their children's behavioral blueprints. Modeling honesty and integrity lays the foundation for children to mirror these values in their interactions. Beyond the Immediate: Building Long-Term Emotional Health Fostering Emotional Intelligence : Tools and Techniques Emotional intelligence is the compass that guides children through the terrain of complex emotions. Equipping them with this compass is essential for navigating relationships without resorting to manipulation. Teaching Empathy : Cultivating Understanding and Compassion Empathy is the bridge to understanding others. Teaching children to view situations from multiple perspectives fosters a sense of compassion, diluting the impulse to manipulate. The Role of Professional Guidance : When and How to Seek Help Sometimes, the expertise of child psychologists or family therapists is invaluable. They offer strategies tailored to your family's unique dynamics, providing a roadmap out of manipulative behaviors. Conclusion: Strengthening Bonds Through Understanding Understanding and addressing manipulative behaviors is a journey of mutual growth. It's about strengthening the bonds of trust and communication, ensuring that the family dynamics evolve in a healthy, supportive direction. Until Next Time... Facebook X (Twitter) WhatsApp LinkedIn Pinterest Copy link Help us spread the word! Share this article across all your favorite platforms now!

Dive into the real talk about guiding teenagers, the rollercoaster of raising teens, and why parental downtime isn't just nice to have—it's damn necessary. Navigating the Teen Years: A Guide to Preventing Parental Burnout GT Mashup Blog: Episode 009 Written By : Daniel Currie Published On : 2 /8 /2024 Relativity Rating: Everybody Under 20 What's this? The teen years are a wild ride. Get real insights and no-BS strategies for guiding teenagers and making parental downtime a non-negotiable part of life. Let's get real for a minute. Parenting teenagers is like being on a never-ending emotional rollercoaster. One second, they're sweet and loving, and the next, they're slamming doors because you asked them how their day was. It's enough to drive anyone to the brink. And let's not even start on the advice everyone seems to have about raising teens. But here's the honest truth: without some serious parental downtime, we're all just a sneeze away from losing our shit. The Tightrope Walk of Guiding Teenagers Raising teens is a balancing act between giving them the freedom to screw up and being there to catch them when they do. Like that time my daughter decided she would dye her hair pink... with permanent dye... the night before picture day. Deep breaths, right? It's in these "what the hell were you thinking?" moments that we have to remember: they're growing, learning, and, yes, making some questionable fashion choices along the way. The Emotional Whiplash is Real If you've got a teen in the house, you know the emotional whiplash I'm talking about. One minute you're the best parent ever, and the next, you're apparently ruining their life because you said no to a party on a school night. It's exhausting. And if we're not careful, it can lead to full-blown parental burnout. That's why it's so damn important to carve out some "me time." Why Parental Downtime is Non-Negotiable Here's the thing: we can't be good parents if we're running on empty. And let's be honest, trying to mediate teenage drama without a break? It's a recipe for disaster. We need downtime like we need air to breathe. Whether it's locking the bathroom door for a long soak without a phone in sight or hitting the gym to sweat out the stress, that shit is essential. Think of it this way: you wouldn't expect your phone to run without ever plugging it in, right? So why do we expect ourselves to keep going without ever taking a moment to recharge? It's not just about avoiding burnout; it's about showing our kids that taking care of yourself isn't just okay—it's necessary. The Essential Dos of Surviving the Teen Years 1) Laugh It Off. Sometimes, you've just got to laugh to keep from crying. Your kid dyed their hair green? Great, they're expressing themselves. They forgot their homework for the umpteenth time? It'll teach them responsibility... eventually. 2) Talk It Out. Keep those lines of communication open, even when it feels like talking to a brick wall. Every so often, you'll get through, and those moments are gold. 3) Claim Your Space. Seriously, take your downtime. Hide in the closet with a stash of chocolate if that's what it takes. No judgment here. 4) Ask for Help. It takes a village to raise a kid, and there's no shame in tapping out for a bit. Friends, family, or a therapist can be lifesavers. Wrapping It Up Parenting teenagers is not for the faint of heart. It's messy, it's loud, and it's filled with more drama than a reality TV show. But it's also incredibly rewarding. So let's not forget to take care of ourselves. Because at the end of the day, a happy, relaxed parent is the best kind of parent there is. Remember, it's okay to say, "Screw it, I need a break." That's not failing; it's being human. So go ahead, claim that parental downtime with all the fierceness of a teenager asserting their independence. You've earned it, and damn, it feels good. Until Next Time... Facebook X (Twitter) WhatsApp LinkedIn Pinterest Copy link Help us spread the word! Share this article across all your favorite platforms now!

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One of the most essential and overlooked parts of a relationship with your child is the ability to identify and understand their personality. We must know their qualities and tendencies as they become tweens and into teens to improve communication and assist with their moral compass. There are right and wrong ways to go about this; this article will cover all you need to know to get to know your teen's personality. Start Here! Blogs More More Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Find us on Social! >>> Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Raising Te ens Today & Personalities : The 2-way Street PART I One of the most essential and overlooked parts of a robust and healthy relationship with your child, regardless of age, is the ability to identify and understand their personality. It becomes crucial to ensure we know their qualities and tendencies as they become tweens and teens to improve communication and assist with their moral compass. There are right and wrong ways to go about this; this article will cover all you need to know to get to know your teen's personality without becoming overbearing or forcing your personality onto them. I would also like to invite you to stick around next week for part two, where we go into depth on why teenagers need to understand your personality too! You don't want to miss it! Jump to a Section : Raising Teens Today & Personality: The 2-way Street - PART I ► Intro (top of page) ► Personality Tests ► Step Up: The Pyramid ► Enjoy the Summit, Briefly ► Descend: The Pyramid, CAREFULLY ► I Found Their Personality. Now What? ► Conclusion ► Comments — Notations & References — Personality Test: MBTI — Personality Test: Big 5 — The Bare Essentials — Safety Needs — Love & Belonging — Appreciation — Self-Actualization — T he Pyramid Overview — Observe the Tick — Focusing on the Quirk — Finding the Personality in the Middle — Missing the Mark — Accept Their Personality - NEVER resent it! — Why is it so vital to understand their personality? — Crack the Code, Begin Communicating Take a moment and SUBSCRIBE Never miss a blog post Stay informed Newsletters and web-happenings Chance for upcoming freebies & merch ► BUT YOU HAVE TO BE A SUBSCRIBER! DON'T WORRY, IT'S FREE! ◄ Written By DanielCurrie Published: August 21, 2023 Personality Tests When grasping your teenager's personality, there is a right and wrong way to do this. First, when looking for their personality traits as parents, we want details like they came from something other than a painting by Picasso. Instead, we only wish to use broad strokes to get the basics, nothing too specific. In other words, we CANNOT and MUST NOT try to become amateur psychologists and diagnose them. Even if you are a board-certified psychologist, there still should be no need¹. But, if you find yourself doing this or needing to take your child or teen to the doctor for evaluation, or to get a professional opinion, for no other reason but to "find out" what personality your teen has or to see what one of the 16 MBTI traits they possess, you are doing it all wrong. Save Personality Test: MBTI Save There are two well-known personality tests that you can take yourself if you choose for fun. When trying to understand your teenager's personality as a parent, neither of these tests should explicitly define your teen—in the best circumstances, it could be used as a guide. The first test is called the MBTI, which stands for Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, named after the mother & daughter duo, Katharine Cook Briggs and her daughter, Isabel Briggs Myers. The pair invented the test after being inspired by the Swiss psychoanalyst Carl Jung on personality theories². For more information on the MBTI, check out SimplyPsycology.org's page³ and use their chart to see how you (or anyone else) stack up! Personality Test: Big 5 The "Big 5" Personality Traits are the second personality of the two tests. The "Big 5" can be considered the broad stroke if the MBTI is the Picasso. Some know it better as OCEAN⁴. OCEAN stands for the five personality traits in the "Big 5": O penness : One who is curious and has imagination. Fondness for the arts, new experiences, and ideas. C onscientiousness : Always working towards achievements, pushing the bar to be the best, and ensuring excellence in part due to self-discipline. E xtraversion : Known as a "people's person," how friendly, energetic, and sociable a person is. They draw energy from being around others. A greeableness : Enjoys peace and harmony. Typically optimistic, generous, and kind while trying to get along with others. N euroticism : Gravitates towards negativity. These types of emotions include but are not limited to anger, anxiety, and depression. Save A parent's role is to raise their children from the ground up. From the day our children are born up to the time they move out as an adult, we, as parents, are continuously trying to raise and sculpt them starting with basic needs, their physiological needs, such as food and shelter. By utilizing Mozlow's Hierarchy of Needs⁵, we can understand what our teens need in life to be great, successful adults. Step Up: The Pyramid Start Save The Bare Essentials As we make our way up the pyramid, we will slowly see glimpses of their personalities; the more we observe, the better communication and relating with them will become. At the base of the pyramid is the bare essentials. Parents should always raise their children with food and shelter, among other necessities. Save Safety Needs Once their basic needs are covered, a parent's duties are far from complete. Next is to address all their safety needs, ensuring a stable and secure life. Ensuring our teens feel comfortable with daily routines, schooling, and extracurricular activities is vital for their emotional growth. Save Love & Belonging Parents that ensure a roof over their teen's head and ensure rides to school are only parenting at 40% (we can all agree there is so much more to parenting; kudos to all you parents out there!) Mentally and emotionally strong teens will always have the best chance for success in life. To establish this for their teen, parents must guarantee their child feels a powerful sense of love and belonging in the home while trying to give them the best chance for emotional success outside the house. Save Appreciation When a strong sense of belonging occurs, their self-esteem, respect, worth, and status will naturally flourish without much guidance or oversight from mom and dad (or guardian). Your teen will begin to show appreciation for themselves and others, giving them a sense of self-actualization or the willingness and eagerness to do something great with their life—the top step in our pyramid. Save Self-Actualization As your teen makes it to the summit of the pyramid and holds their future in their hand confidently, with conviction, and a sense of purpose, you can rest assured that you have done a fantastic job parenting. Pat yourself on the back: as a parent, you've gone from giving your child nothing but merely a roof over their head to showing them the way through life, crucially and perhaps most challenging, by guiding teenagers into adulthood with a sense of purpose. Save Enjoy the Summit, Briefly The steps to raising a solid teenager are complete. Continue maintaining the pyramid by utilizing some of the essential parenting dos and don'ts discussed in previous blog articles. As you continue to support your teen from atop the pyramid, it's time to go back down step by step to obtain insight and improve your relationship with them that much better. As any great, committed parent will agree, a parent's work is never done. Save The Pyramid Overview All the steps are complete, and we've enjoyed the proverbial view from atop the summit and all that we have accomplished as great parents. As you can see, we have some more steps to go, specifically in gaining insight into the minds and personalities of your young ones. Save After raising your teen with essential parenting dos and don'ts—and proving that it has been successful via the pyramid, it is critical to head back down. Why though? We climb the pyramid to raise our teens to the best of our ability but carefully, gradually, and discreetly head back down to UNDERSTAND their personalities, quirks, and what makes them tick. When we do this, it is essential to find the sweet spot and aim for it, trying to keep it manageable. The closer we reach the mark, the better our understanding of our teen will be. Descend: The Pyramid, CAREFULLY End Save Observing the Tick Save The target mark to thoroughly understand their personality is the middle of the pyramid: Love and Belonging. To get there, we need to start at the top, so as we get to know our teens on the self-actualization level with their newfound confidence and ambitions (compliments to your great parenting!), we gain insight into what makes them tick. Understanding their desires, passions, life goals, and what drives them will paint a vivid picture of how they feel about specific topics and self-found morals and ethics. Furthermore, it forces their reasonings and why they may have such a deep conviction regarding certain opinions, beliefs, or ideas. Focusing on the Quirk Now that we understand their desires for life, we also understand why and what makes them tick. Carefully moving down the pyramid, we arrive at the esteem level. This level will show insight into their quirks and reveal more personality. Remember, as we molded our teens in this step, it included building their self-esteem, and emotional strength, liberating them from the fear of ridicule. As the layers peel back and we begin to see our teen's self-esteem thrive, it begins to reveal the quirks that make them unique with their personality that makes them one of a kind. Save Finding the Personality in the Middle Save Arriving at the sweet spot in the pyramid, love & belonging, will show us all we need to know about our teenager's personality. Coupled with their ticks and quirks, studying their enjoyment of friendships and connecting with others will show us how emotionally invested they are in relationships. This pyramid section will reveal their personality and social tendencies with friends and strangers—interactions between others and virtually any emotion. Observing your teen with the mindset of their feelings will establish their personality when trying to understand where they are coming from and what they believe in due to their emotional stance on the situation. Missing the Mark So what happens when we fall short or overshoot the "pyramid" mark? Hitting the target of the Love and Belonging section of the pyramid is difficult and similar to a game of curling. Don't try to overdo it, but make sure you also put enough effort into it. If you put little effort into trying to, you will only scratch the surface and need help understanding what makes them tick. If you try too hard, you will drive them away as you overinvest in analyzing every aspect and appear controlling instead of inviting and supporting. Save I Found Their Personality. Now What? Accept Their Personality - NEVER Resent It! As you learn their personality and what makes them tick and why, figuring out their quirks along the way, under no circumstance should you hold a grudge to it. This is who they are, their personality, and what makes them unique. If you try to change a person's personality because you do not like or approve of it, even if it's just a portion of it, it is the equivalent of saying, "I do not support you (or a part of you), and you must change to meet my expectations." Please note that you must accept and respect their personality; they are entitled to it. Crucially, it does NOT mean you must approve of their tastes and lifestyles. Save Why is it so vital to understand their personality? Your teen will undoubtedly do things you do not approve of at times or, at the very least, go against the grain of your teachings. Once you begin to understand their personality, it will allow for a better understanding of why they do what they do. Furthermore, when you can see their thought process more clearly, even if unapproving, you can begin to appreciate their reasoning, which will translate into better relations. Save Crack the Code, Begin Communicating Continuing to hone in on that sweet spot of understanding their personality will get you closer to understanding the reasoning for their decisions. The more you know about their reasons, the better your relationship will become because you can see both sides more clearly and with less bias. Handling the situation will become more effective when you can talk and relate to your teen, better understanding their thoughts. Save Conclusion In the end, if you can better understand and communicate with your teen, the more and easier you will get through to them the way you want. Despite teens being teens and rolling their eyes, if you can understand their personality, the more you will connect and communicate with your teen, the more your relationship will improve. There is one other part to the personality equation: the teen. We can attempt to talk and woo our teens since we know the tricks to their personalities, but it will only work effectively if our teens are willing to meet us halfway. Stay tuned next week for the 2nd part of the two-part series on teens needing to understand their parent's personalities and how to handle personality changes. Your Opinion Matters! Leave a comment. Let us know what you think! comments debug Comments Write a comment Write a comment Share Your Thoughts Be the first to write a comment. ▲ Back to Top Start Here! Blogs More More Find us on Social! >>> CurlyStache Blogs: A division of CurlyStache, www.curlystache.com . | Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Copyright notice: All images on this page, including all pages within the https://www.curlystache.com domain, are fully licensed or created for the sole purpose of this website. For additional information, please contact us at admin@curlystache.com Notations & References ¹ This blog is written for children and teens under normal circumstances, with no mental or physical issues requiring a neurologist, psychologist, or other specialist. If you have questions about your child's psychological or physical health, check with your healthcare provider first. This article is NOT intended to assist in any diagnosis or to prove/disprove any medical conditions. ²5 things you didn't know about the history of the Myers-Briggs system by Janet Nguyen ³How The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Works: 16 Personality Types by Julia Simkus, reviewed by Saul Mcleod, Ph.D. ⁴The creative personality: Which of the Big 5 Personality Traits is associated with creativity by Nick Skillicorn ⁵Maslow's Hierarchy Of Needs by Saul Mcleod , Ph.D., reviewed by Olivia Guy Evans

"Raffish Daughter," is this week's Mashup, edging a short story with a personal blog. A little girl's adorable charm and futile attempt. Learn the whole story. Staying true to the CurlyStache mission, only opinionated and grounded in facts. Start Here! Blogs More More Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Find us on Social! >>> The Mashup: Short Raising Teens Blog Entries. Opinionated. Grounded in Facts. 001 - 10.02.23 Raffish Daughter I love my daughter to death, but damn, she can be a raffish one sometimes. Let's not get confused; I'm not saying ravish, which she can be that too when she wants to. Raffish, for those of you who do not entirely know, means "unconventional, in an attractive way" or "unconventional and slightly disreputable, especially in an attractive manner." It always starts the same, perhaps not doing a chore, like forgetting to take out the trash when it's her turn. I confront her about it, and she swiftly uses her charm and attacks my weaknesses, captivating me with the "daddy's girl" spell. As always, once she had it, without hesitation, the little 8th grader of 4-foot 9-inch smiled and insisted she did it, but it must have gotten filled up again. She gives me every reason to believe her—even though the evidence disproving her argument was blatantly in front of us. It's cute and comical. I should be mad and put my foot down, but I can't; she knows she did wrong because she's trying like hell to convince me otherwise. What is a father to do? Yep, that's my little raffish princess. How many other mothers and fathers out there have that problem? I'm willing to bet all of us see it occasionally. It's ok! And as long as it's minor stuff, such as forgetting to take out the garbage, those little raffish moments are equally good for parents and children. Stay with me here; I have some logic as to why these moments can be good. My daughter forgot to take out the trash. If I yelled or punished her every time she did not do a chore correctly or perfectly, it would only lead to my little girl dealing with constant self-esteem issues, belittling, or fearing the authoritarian parent —which I don't want her to endure, especially since I was raised in a home like that. Instead, we usually play the game of "not my fault," "figment of your imagination, Dad," or "it got messy again after I cleaned it," whatever. We both know that she's in the wrong and is trying to throw every attempt to get out of it at me, despite how futile sometimes. I'll usually play along unless it is a constant issue where she needs to learn from her mistake, in which case she knows pretty quickly when it's pointless to try. Regardless, though, in allowing her to win small little battles when it's clear and obvious that she messed up and with a "stern dad warning" at the end of the ordeal, my little girl will understand her mistake easier because she, in essence, is pointing out her own mistakes as she tries to talk her way out of it. This will lead to her learning with dignity and without having to tell her directly that she failed. Will she break a rule and not learn from her innocent dance? Of course. Will she take advantage of me, knowing I can be a sucker for the Daddy's Girl deal? Yes, she's already figured that out. It's okay, though. I don't mind doing the song and dance with her as long as I know she is learning and I stay consistent, allowing her to win the "less important" battles. That is the bottom line for this entry. Stay consistent and personable with your teen, see through the BS in their raffish personality, and pick and choose your battles; you and your teen will appreciate it (even if they don't say it!), knowing their attempts are at least being heard, no matter how ridiculous it may sound sometimes! Until next time! Date Monday, October 2, 2023 (Copy Again) Copy Link https://www.curlystache.com/mashup Episode 001 - "Raffish Daughter" ▲ Back to Top Start Here! Blogs More More Find us on Social! >>> CurlyStache Blogs: A division of CurlyStache, www.curlystache.com . | Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Copyright notice: All images on this page, including all pages within the https://www.curlystache.com domain, are fully licensed or created for the sole purpose of this website. For additional information, please contact us at admin@curlystache.com

This rasing teens blog contains the top 5 essential parenting dos to prepare your teen for the school year 2023 with back-to-school habits. In addition, how to get organized, plan school shopping, and address your expectations for your teen. Other critical items outlined in this post include planning transportation and what to expect if your child starts a new school. Start Here! Blogs More More Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Find us on Social! >>> Raising Teens Today and the 5 Essential Parenting Dos for Going Back to School in 2023 Kick your feet up, bathe in the sun, enjoy family time around the campfire, and vacation with your loved ones. Now that it's August, there is little time left to enjoy the summer spectacles with your kids and teens before it's back to the grind of school. In this raising teens blog post, we will cover essential parenting dos and don'ts when getting your children ready to start the school routine back up in full swing with the top 5 essential parenting dos to prepare your teen for the school year. Jump to a Section : Raising Teens Today and the 5 Essential Parenting Dos for Going Back to School in 2023 Written By Dan Currie Published: August 14, 2023 ╔ Intro (top of page) ╠ #1 : Back to School Habits and Sleep ║ ║ ║ ╠ #2 : School Shopping ║ ║ ╠ #3 : Get Organized ║ ║ ║ ╠ #4 : Expectations ║ ║ ║ ║ ║ ╠ #5 : Transportation ║ ║ ║ ╠ Conclusion ╠ BONUS #6 ╚ Comments ├ Start Small: Curfew ├ How Much Sleep? └ Sleep Schedule Mastered ├ The Essentials └ The Wearables ├ Old School Calendar ├ School Schedule └ Open-Campus Programs & Lunches ├ Summer vs. School Rules ├ The Usual Expectations ├ Phone & Electronics ├ Off-School Hours, On-Campus └ Rule Changes & Refreshers ├ School Bus ├ Private Rides └ Extracurricular & Communication Back to School Habits and Sleep Start Small: Curfew When raising teens today, whether physically or mentally, a developing mind and body require regular routines to rely on so the mind and body don't work overtime and become tired and run down. As you can imagine, this is critical for teens returning to school. A simple curfew is a good starting point to transition your teen from summer to school life . Curfews are an excellent way to allow some downtime at night and begin forming your teen's routine , which can help prepare them for the upcoming sleep schedules and school routines. How Much Sleep? A constant, stable sleep schedule is paramount. We all need a dependable sleep schedule of 8 hours to repair and recharge our bodies and sharpen our minds efficiently. Our teens, however, per the CDC, require 8 to 10 hours ; tweens even more, ranging between 9 and 12 hours of sleep per 24-hour period. We must ensure our children are well-rested for school, which will assist in staying focused throughout the school day and not feeling lethargic while boosting their mood and behavior . How much sleep someone needs depends on their age. The American Academy of Sleep Medicine has recommended that children aged 6–12 years should regularly sleep 9–12 hours per 24 hours and teenagers aged 13–18 years should sleep 8–10 hours per 24 hours. - CDC Healthy Schools Sleep Schedule Mastered It is important to note that teens are naturally wired to stay up late and sleep in . If your teen is a night owl and has been staying up late, start by allowing them to continue, but make sure they wake up 8 to 10 hours later , not excessively sleeping in . Gradually push the time back by an hour every few days or week. Keep doing this until you reach the time they need to be in bed on a school night, ensuring they wake up the next morning like it is a school day. Establish this routine for at least five days before the start of the school year to prevent trouble getting up and staying awake throughout the day. School Shopping The Essentials Most schools require essential items such as pens, notebooks, folders, and binders—and nowadays, this may include electronics such as earbuds; make a list so everything is remembered. Typically schools will also send out information regarding the basic materials needed , be mindful of this and watch for it in your mail, email, or school website . If it is not feasible to acquire the items, reach out to your local school district , which will usually assist in supplying them or direct you to an assistance program . The Wearables Along the lines of school supplies, another trendy topic is school clothes . Ensure it does not violate school policies when buying your teen school clothes , despite what your child may like. If your school mandates uniforms , ensure your child follows these guidelines , and you purchase any clothing not included with the uniform, such as undergarments or gym clothes , if applicable. Pro tip : as all parents with teenage kids know, they grow like weeds! Think about going a size up if they are in their growth spurt. Get Organized Old School Calendar This topic makes sailing very smooth if you can capitalize on it . The more organized you can get, the less hectic, chaotic, and stressful it will be . As stated in the previous topic, create a list of items needed for school and discuss it with your teen to confirm that you remember everything. Then sit down with them and make a calendar of their upcoming events ; put your affairs on the calendar there with theirs . Doing this is particularly helpful if your teen participates in sports, clubs, or other extracurricular activities. Now you and your teen can better tackle future conflicts and address them head-on before it becomes problematic. School Schedule Continue being proactively organized and ensure your teen receives their schedule from the school so they know where they are supposed to be and when; most schools will send home the school schedule a few weeks beforehand via mail or email . They may take frequent outside or off-campus classes, such as an environmental sciences class. It is essential to check and see that no permission slips or release forms need to be signed to participate in their class or activities. Sit with your teen and discuss their schedule actively , asking them about their schedule, the classes they are taking, and what is involved in each class. Open-Campus Programs & Lunches Many high schools hold an open-campus program for seniors or students with excellent grades allowing them to arrive late, leave early, or leave the school property during study hall or lunch periods . If your teen has these privileges, ensure the proper documentation and forms are signed if you approve of them enjoying that benefit. If these benefits do not pertain to your teen or they cannot leave for lunch, ensure you have a plan for their lunches . Plan it out . Are they buying lunch from the cafeteria or paper-bagging it? If packing their lunch is the way to go, plan and stay organized: make a lunch calendar . It doesn't necessarily mean certain days eat certain meals or even the same meals daily unless you choose to. Instead, utilize the calendar like a shopping list , ensuring you have everything you need until the next shopping trip. Be sure to add healthy snacks on there too ! When doesn't a teen stop eating? Expectations Summer vs. School Rules There should also be a time to sit down with your teen and review some ground rules, or expectations , for when school begins. For example, summer vacation rules typically are more lax because it is precisely that: vacation. Explain to them what you, as their parents expect regarding their behavior, responsibilities, housework, curfews, friends, and work life , if applicable. Along that notion, ensure they understand your expectations of the school's rules . It could mean explaining what will happen if you get a phone call from the school because they are missing a class; this way, there are no surprises if and when that incident happens. The Usual Expectations Cover most logical situations , such as skipping school, participating in fights, failing subjects, substance abuse, or disrespect . Explain the consequences at home in conjunction with any school punishments . Doing this will make them more likely to think their decision through , knowing that the consequences could be compounded. Lastly, include items you want them to avoid bringing to school from home , such as something of great value. Phone & Electronics Discuss the phone and electronics policies for your school , and if there are additional rules regarding their phone, Internet usage , etc., Ensure you address them, confirming they understand what could happen if the school and home rules are violated . Off-School Hours, On-Campus If your teen plans on riding the school bus or is involved in athletic or other extracurricular activities before or after school , do due diligence , research the expectations , and confirm their understanding . Let this also include general school property rules and etiquette when school is not in session. Rule Changes & Refreshers While discussing some of this with your teen is considered expected and common knowledge and therefore seems unnecessary, I assure you it is essential to discuss . Taking an evening a few weeks before school to let them know what you expect is a good refresher every year —and as they get older, perhaps the rules change and bend as they mature. This essential "brush up on rules" is also an excellent time to get your teen's input , incorporate changes , reflect on the past, and look to the future . Transportation Planning School Bus The final item to ensure you cover is transportation . First and foremost, determine whether your teen will be taking the school bus or something private . If they are utilizing the school bus, gather the necessary information from the bus garage or school distric t, including the pick-up time, location (if not at your residence), and drop-off time and place . Check with the school; bus forms may be required to ride . Private Rides If your teen is not taking the school bus, decide what is best for your teen's transportation needs and involve them throughout the process so they are in the know and can ask questions along the way . Depending on your proximity to the school, parenting work/activity schedules, climate, and many other possibilities, determine the best transportation options and for what days . Whether it's driving them to school, they are old enough to drive themselves, walk, skate, bike, carpool, or whatever—it is critical to go over the details and communicate it as a family . Be sure to include the family or friend in a carpool situation so that a ride is not missed and, crucially, for their safety . Extracurricular & Communication School clubs, athletics, and other activities like marching band may require early drop-off or late pick-up. Make plans for this as early as possible , utilizing carpooling with teammates/classmates and other parents if necessary. Just as important as securing a ride to or from their activity, make sure to let their usual method of transportation know the days your teen will not need a ride . Communication is critical regarding transportation needs , whether courtesy or safety ; it is one thing never to be overlooked . In Conclusion Returning to school tugs on all sorts of emotions during this time of year. The excitement and anticipation of entering a new grade and seeing old friends, the anxiety of a challenging subject, the dread of school itself, and the appreciation of climbing the mountain of books to be rewarded with an A+. It is our job as parents to set our teens up for success. We must deliver the fastball down the middle to them, ensuring they are ready for the year ahead by following the 5 Essential Parenting Dos for Going Back to School in 2023. If we do this correctly and the pitch is perfect, they will have no problem knocking it out of the park, making us the proud parents we are! Lastly, before I close this blog out, I want to leave you with a personal bonus step that frequently gets overlooked; especially with those teens having to make a new start in a strange new environment. Please indulge in "A New Start" and know that we haven't forgotten about you, those going through an entirely different phase in your life. To those of you, I wish you the best of luck in your journey! A New Start For those parents and teens who are beginning a new chapter in their life with a move to a new school district: Parents, we can handle a move to a new town, but please remain sensitive and understanding that it is one of the most challenging things your teen will have to undergo to that point in their school careers. Here is a list of things to keep doing for them: Support them emotionally, and follow their lead ; if they need space, give it to them , but ensure they know you are there for them no matter what. If they act out, and reprimanding them is required, try not to limit their social devices unless absolutely necessary so they can continue to see and communicate with old friends and family members in their former town. Allow for weekend trips or day trips back to their former hometown until they begin making new friends to help prevent possible depression and homesickness . It will take about half of the school year for them to fully transition , begin making close friends, and establish a social life; remember, they are going through a lot during this period . Your Opinion Matters! Leave a comment. Let us know what you think! comments debug Comments Write a comment Write a comment Share Your Thoughts Be the first to write a comment. ▲ Back to Top Start Here! Blogs More More Find us on Social! >>> CurlyStache Blogs: A division of CurlyStache, www.curlystache.com . | Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Copyright notice: All images on this page, including all pages within the https://www.curlystache.com domain, are fully licensed or created for the sole purpose of this website. For additional information, please contact us at admin@curlystache.com

As a teen, remember that feeling you had when you dated that one person? Enchanting and spellbinding. You swore you would be with them forever. You made sure everybody knew it with the way you talked, acted, and drooled over them. That is mawkish at its finest. This episode explores that and raising teens today. Start Here! Blogs More More Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Find us on Social! >>> You are Here: CurlyStache | Mashup: Mawkish Privacy Policy | Cookies Policy | About Us The Mashup: Short Raising Teens Blog Entries. Opinionated. Grounded in Facts. 006 - 11.11.23 Mawkish: Nauseating Affection "Your speech last weekend was awfully mawkish. I can't say I've ever seen that side of you. Feel free not to show it again." That is a perfect example of how to use that weird word. Kudos to you if you know what it means and how it ties into so many teens. I admit I've been guilty of mawkishness, like most teens who just hit puberty, ride the emotions train, and get blinded by passions. Mawkish is another way of saying so sappy that it is sickening, being excessively sentimental, like a fool in love. In cartoon terms, it's the Looney Tunes' Pepe Le Pew. For those who don't know him, go to YouTube and search for him. OK, so the mawkish tendencies of Pepe weren't as much the obsession over Penelope Pussycat as the mushy-gushy stuff when Pepe actually gets his arms around Penelope. So, let's think back: how many of you had that one boyfriend or girlfriend you fell madly in love with, adored, or worshiped in some sense, where nothing else mattered? Oh, and of course, nothing could split you apart? You know, feeling like Bonnie and Clyde when you were together. I'm willing to bet that you gushed about them to your friends and family. As you did this, your parents grinned, thinking in the back of their heads, "Yep, puppy love," your friends rolled their eyes, getting sick of hearing about it. Meanwhile, your sibling(s) were making gagging noises in disapproval. Those things that you said and did were mawkish to the fault. Next question: how many of you have seen this in your teens? If you haven't yet, you probably will, and it will be simultaneously cute, happy, and utterly annoying. Now, throw in being a good parent and trying to delicately reel them back down to earth from cloud 9 so they don't get as hurt in the end. That can become a tricky situation if not handled correctly. How should you handle this? Good question. I haven't figured that out yet, and I think nobody really has (if you have, let us know!). Regardless, whenever and however you go about it, their reaction will undoubtedly be, "[the person] and I will be together forever. Nothing will split us apart! Not even You!" Take solace in knowing you tried to rope them back to reality despite the assurance that it could never end. All you can do now is be there for them with guidance and advice when they request it. Refrain from force-feeding them any relationship advice or recommendations for relationship longevity. This is crucial. Remember, they already think they know everything and will be together forever. Suppose you attempt to intervene with an uninvited idea or suggestion. It will most likely be seen as a sabotaged recommendation thanks to their emotionally blind love—it goes without saying that it would not help your teen's morale, emotional growth, and the relationship between you and your teen. I know about this all too well. I have always been an emotional dude, always very passionate about my feelings, including (puppy) love. Unfortunately, back in grade school, a few knew about this and took advantage of it. Around January, right after Christmas, this cute girl began making herself known around me and kept flirting. After two weeks, one of her friends told me to ask her out because she really liked me (and I liked her!), so I did. I was the definition of mawkish. I held hands down the hallway, kissed every chance I could, talked on the phone with her after school until late at night, and practically ignored the world around me as she became my world, eventually telling her I loved her. February 14th came. Valentine's Day. I bought her a dozen roses, a giant teddy bear, balloons, and chocolates. Long story short, I was the sap, and a week later, she broke up with me. Looking back on it, it served me right, and it's kind of comical now, but damn, it hurt back then, even after I told my parents she was the one. I can only imagine what my parents were thinking. Thank god they didn't say, "I told you so!" The story's moral is to be a good parent and prepare your teen for the possible downfall if they seem to be falling head over heels for someone. If they don't listen, that is on them, a lesson hard learned but one they must learn on their own—and if they ask for advice and take what you give them, they are in even better shape! Regardless, kick back, relax, and enjoy the nauseating, oversentimental, sappy mawkishness. Until next time! Relativity Date Saturday, November 11, 2023 Share Blog Episode 006 - "Mawkish: Nauseating Affection" (Copy Again) Copy Link Help us spread the word! This is how we grow and flourish as a blog and website. From me to you and your friends. https://www.curlystache.com/mashup/mawkish What? So, what exactly is the Mashup? Precisely as it sounds: a blend of online writing styles in a format ranging from storytelling and structured to opinionated to factual, formal to casual, and personal to professional—all while ensuring we keep true to the CurlyStache mission of guiding teenagers and raising teens today in a volatile society. The Mashup is designed to be more opinionated, grounded in facts, less researched, and directed to spark ideas and discussions. When? During the weeks I cannot get a blog out, I will fill that void with a Mashup entry. Remember to follow us on Facebook @CurlyStache Blogs and through all your favorite social media outlets to get notified of the newest releases! And be sure to share it with friends and families that could benefit! Why? I enjoy writing and expressing my opinions on essential issues when raising teens today. There are times throughout the week when I cannot get to my computer as much as I would like—or cannot do my due diligence and research a blog to present it how I want it and still be backed by facts. This fills the void. Short articles containing whatever is on my mind grounded in current events relating to parenting and teen issues, writing in whatever style vibing at the time. ▲ Back to Top Start Here! Blogs More More Find us on Social! >>> You are Here: CurlyStache | Mashup: Mawkish Privacy Policy | Cookies Policy | Contact Us CurlyStache Blogs: A division of CurlyStache, www.curlystache.com . | Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Copyright notice: All images on this page, including all pages within the https://www.curlystache.com domain, are fully licensed or created for the sole purpose of this website. For additional information, please contact us at admin@curlystache.com

With today's generation of teens. Is parenting gone wrong or just misunderstood? You be the judge. Learn the whole story. Staying true to the CurlyStache mission, only opinionated and grounded in facts. Start Here! Blogs More More Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Find us on Social! >>> The Mashup: Short Raising Teens Blog Entries. Opinionated. Grounded in Facts. 003 - 10.20.23 Mollycoddle: The Epidemic Controversial, you may agree or disagree, but authentic and true to form, the Mashup motto goes: "Opinionated. Grounded in Facts." Still, a real problem exists with children, teens, and even young adults and parents mollycoddling them. A handful of you may ask, "What the hell is 'mollycoddling'?" I don't blame you. I was one to Google it, too, when I first heard the word. When Googling it, you will find the definition of (to) "treat (someone) in an indulgent or overprotective way." A handful of similar words include: coddle, spoil, overindulge, and pamper. This should give you a good feel for what I'm talking about. Anyway, is it safe to say you know of at least a few children or teens like that, expecting tasks to be done for them, particularly the more difficult and demanding ones? Even emotional mollycoddling within reason, where their feelings could be challenged if it doesn't bring instant gratification? I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but parents are responsible. Not the child or teen. You cannot blame anyone else besides the parent or guardian. They are the enablers. And yes, sometimes they don't even realize they are doing it- that's for a different discussion. After the turn of the century in the United States, there has been a significant uptick in this behavior among children and teens. As parents, we must remember there is a fine line between wanting what's best for our teens and pampering, spoiling, or indulging. Understand that you are not doing them any favors by doing the hard things, physically or emotionally; it will only make it more challenging for them as they become more independent and are out on their own. It makes it hard for your soon-to-be young adult teen to process challenging, problematic scenarios. Their knee-jerk reaction is to want Mom and Dad to come and fix it because that is what they are familiar with, how they were raised, and what makes them the most comfortable. Suppose a parent goes overboard, mollycoddles, and overindulges them, saying the hell with it. Whether it's for selfish reasons like their kid is getting on their nerves or throwing a temper tantrum and just needs them to chill out a bit—or alternatively, the parent wants to do it as a form of setting them up for success because they can get it done quicker, ensuring their kid has the quickest and simplest path to success . In that case, they are doing them absolutely no favors except setting them up for failure. Not to get it twisted, parents should always be there to HELP their children and teens in whatever capacity they require to grow and develop, but mollycoddling is not helping. Simply ensuring we are being there for our children and teens and supporting them in their needs is quintessential parenting. The critical difference between being a great parent, being there, and supporting teens, compared to a parent who feels the need to mollycoddle, is knowing when to back off. Ask yourself: Can my child figure out how to do this themselves now that I've shown and helped them? -or- They are down on their luck, and time will heal all things with a bit of wisdom; am I preventing them from moving on by dwelling on it with them and trying to fix it, or am I fostering positivity and encouraging them to look to the future and the potential to come? Parents must maintain vigilance, pushing and guiding teenagers towards independence while teaching positive, responsible choices for when the time comes—and mom and dad aren't there to help. When the training wheels are taken off, becoming young adults, those young adults must be ready—or face failure as a parent. Remember, when children and teens are mollycoddled, it becomes clear and evident as they grow older. Their maturity level will appear stunted because their parents have taken the bulk of the harder, more responsible choices off their shoulders throughout the years. Whether it is mental or physical, there is no need to ever mollycoddle. It will only hinder your child's growth as they age, become a teenager, and as they continue becoming young adults. Being a parent is not easy; it's all about bending without breaking and knowing when too much of a good thing is too much. It is a subtle art where you will never reach perfection, but I promise if you keep striving, that will be more than enough, and you can sleep easy knowing you are doing it right! Date Until next time! Friday, October 20, 2023 Share Blog (Copy Again) Copy Link https://www.curlystache.com/mashup/mollycoddle Episode 003 - "Mollycoddle: The Epidemic" What? So, what exactly is the Mashup? Precisely as it sounds: a blend of online writing styles in a format ranging from storytelling and structured to opinionated to factual, formal to casual, and personal to professional—all while ensuring we keep true to the CurlyStache mission of guiding teenagers and raising teens today in a volatile society. The Mashup is designed to be more opinionated, grounded in facts, less researched, and directed to spark ideas and discussions. When? During the weeks I cannot get a blog out, I will fill that void with a Mashup entry. Remember to follow us on Facebook @CurlyStache Blogs and through all your favorite social media outlets to get notified of the newest releases! And be sure to share it with friends and families that could benefit! Why? I enjoy writing and expressing my opinions on essential issues when raising teens today. There are times throughout the week when I cannot get to my computer as much as I would like—or cannot do my due diligence and research a blog to present it how I want it and still be backed by facts. This fills the void. Short articles containing whatever is on my mind grounded in current events relating to parenting and teen issues, writing in whatever style vibing at the time. ▲ Back to Top Start Here! Blogs More More Find us on Social! >>> CurlyStache Blogs: A division of CurlyStache, www.curlystache.com . | Raising Teens Today: Guiding Teenagers with Essential Parenting Dos and Don'ts Copyright notice: All images on this page, including all pages within the https://www.curlystache.com domain, are fully licensed or created for the sole purpose of this website. For additional information, please contact us at admin@curlystache.com

Discover the balance between guidance and freedom in college parenting. Learn how stepping back can foster resilience and independence in your teen. Ditching College Helicopter Parenting for Real Growth GT Mashup Blog: Episode 010 Written By : Daniel Currie Published On : 2 /15 /2024 Relativity Rating: Late Teens & Young Adults What's this? Listen up, folks! We're in deep—knee-deep in the quagmire of college helicopter parenting, and guess what? It's time to yank ourselves out. You've seen it, right? Facebook groups for parents swapping tips on the best flu remedies and where to find that godsend of a foam pool noodle. Because, heaven forbid, Junior's phone takes a dive into the great unknown between the bed and the wall. But here's the kicker: are we really helping, or are we just scared shitless to let them navigate their own lives? It's a tough pill to swallow, realizing that our overbearing parenting style might be clipping their wings instead of prepping them for the flight of life. Real Talk on Independence Remember the first time you rode a bike without training wheels? That exhilarating, terrifying freedom? That's what college should be for our kids. It's their moment to wobble, fall, and get the hell back up again—on their own. But with us constantly lurking in the background, ready to catch them before they even tilt, we're robbing them of this crucial learning curve. The Fine Line Between Guiding and Smothering Guiding teenagers doesn't mean holding their hand every step of the way. It's about being there, sure, but more like a lighthouse guiding a ship home—not the captain steering the damn thing. It's about saying, "I trust you to make your choices, screw up, and learn from them." Because let's be real, the best lessons in life come wrapped in scraped knees and bruised egos. Raising Resilient Teens: The Essential Parenting Dos 1) Let Them Fail. Yeah, you heard me. Allow them to mess up, flunk a test, or miss a deadline. It's not the end of the world; it's the beginning of learning resilience. 2) Teach Problem-Solving. Instead of swooping in to fix every problem, ask them, "How do you plan to tackle this?" It's about empowering them to find solutions. 3) Encourage Independence. This means stepping back. Maybe your kid ends up eating ramen for a week because they blew their budget. It's a lesson learned for next time. 4) Open Communication. Keep those lines open, but don't make every call a check-up call. Sometimes, just listen, laugh, and let them know you're there—no strings attached. The Value of Self-Sufficiency Fostering self-sufficiency isn't just about making our lives easier; it's about preparing them for the real world. When they come to us with a problem, our first response shouldn't be to fix it but to ask, "What do you think you should do?" This approach encourages critical thinking and confidence in their ability to solve problems. Embracing the Chaos (And Growth) of College Life College isn't just an academic journey; it's a crash course in life. By stepping back, we allow our kids the space to navigate roommate issues, budgeting, and the consequences of last-minute cramming. These experiences are invaluable, teaching them about the realities of life and the importance of accountability. Cutting the Cord (Gently) I get it; it's freaking scary. The thought of your kid out there, making decisions without your guidance, can send you into a panic spiral. But here's the thing: we're not raising kids; we're raising future adults. Adults who need to know how to navigate life's ups and downs without a safety net. So, let's take a collective deep breath and take a step back. It's time to trust the process, trust our kids, and maybe, just a little, trust ourselves that we've done a damn good job up until this point. Here's to empowering our teens towards a future they can navigate confidently—foam pool noodles be damned. Until Next Time... Facebook X (Twitter) WhatsApp LinkedIn Pinterest Copy link Help us spread the word! Share this article across all your favorite platforms now!