The Mashup:
Short Raising Teens Blog Entries. Opinionated. Grounded in Facts.

005 - 10.28.23

Memento Mori: Happy Halloween

"Remember that you [have to] die." Yeah, that's eerie enough, and when spoken in Latin, "Memento mori" seems to give it that much more of a breathtaking vibe of mortality and inevitability. Tis the season: Halloween, filled with all the gore, skulls, bones, creeps, witches, and death you can handle, giving you that much more of a chance to think about the true meaning of memento mori.

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Even the universe wants you to remember the fragility of life—you, your teen, and everybody you love in life. Nature wants you to experience its potential onslaught yearly: The days get shorter, darker, and colder, with noticeable brisk winds. Exposed plants start dying off, and trees shrivel, showing their bare bark with a false sense of beauty as the colorful leaves float around. Animals, big and small, begin scurrying around frantically, looking for new homes and hibernating nests to prevent certain death. As it becomes colder, it becomes a mere whisp of memory of how lively it was not even a month ago.

It's always good to be humble and keep the perspective that, despite being intelligent humans, we are and will never be immune to memento mori. Should we dwell on it and become fearful and paranoid that we could die? Does this mean we must amp up our safety game and take more precautions? The answer to both: HARD NO. On the contrary, we should do the exact opposite. If you are in denial about dying, stop. It is the ONLY thing that is a 100% guarantee in life: death. Come to grips. Memento mori is real; we will all have our fateful day, but right now, if you are reading this, you are ALIVE! Enjoy everything life has to offer and make the most of everything!

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Life is a beautiful thing. No, I'm not talking about hugging a tree or safely capturing a gnat to release it outside instead of killing it (unless you want to; remember, you do you!). All I am saying is that every damn thing has its own beauty. Cherish it. Without it, you wouldn't be here, and you wouldn't be who you are.

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That said, next time you see that person you can't stand, that jerk you work with, or whatever the case, despite the anguish you feel, I want you to think, even for the smallest of moments, "I am alive! And I'm free to feel this way, to have these emotions, to be royally pissed and annoyed, and hell, without them being alive too, I couldn't feel this way." Yeah, it's a unique way of looking at it, but it is true. Cherish all you have, the good and evil, and everything in between because that makes you alive.

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When raising teens today, remember that their confusing, chaotic emotions and behaviors are, in essence, the same as yours. There are two primary differences between you feeling that way and your teen feeling that way, making them confusing and chaotic. The first is that you have maturity, and the second is that you have wisdom. As you raise them and they grow, you must fill the void of wisdom and maturity for them until they have their own. If you fail to fill that void, it could lead to unnecessary mistakes and growing pains that could have been avoided, possibly and critically, including a premature memento mori-type situation.

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Nevertheless, enjoy life and hold your teen, family, and all loved ones close, and never let go. One day, the time will come, and the inevitability of death and all that ties us together will be here.

So, enjoy the colorful leaves, jack o'lanterns, children and teens trick or treating, holiday parties, corn mazes, haunted houses, hot cider, and hundreds of other holiday festivities that Holloween, All Hollow's Eve, or All Saints' Eve has to offer! Above all else, keep your kids and teens safe, know where they are and with whom, be present for them, get festive and enjoy the holiday, and tell them you love them because there is a 100% chance of memento mori and a 0% chance of knowing when! Happy Halloween, everyone!

Until next time!

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